Where Did I Put My Keys? Simple Habits for Everyday Forgetfulness

You walk into the kitchen and can’t remember why. The reading glasses were on your head the whole time. The keys turn up in the coat pocket you checked twice. Moments like these happen to almost everyone, and the good news is that a few simple habits can make them less frequent and a lot less stressful.

This article looks at why everyday slips happen, what the National Institute on Aging (NIA) and Mayo Clinic suggest doing about them, and how to tell ordinary forgetfulness from something worth mentioning to your doctor.

Everyday Slips Are Common

According to the NIA, as people grow older some notice that they don’t recall information as well or as quickly as they once did, and may occasionally misplace things or forget to pay a bill. The NIA describes these as usually signs of mild forgetfulness, not a serious memory problem. It also notes that taking longer to learn something new is often a normal part of aging.

Part of the trick is attention. Mayo Clinic points out that if you focus on the information you’re trying to remember, you’re more likely to recall it later. Many “lost” items were never really stored in memory in the first place, because we put them down while thinking about something else.

Give Everyday Things a Home

Both the NIA and Mayo Clinic recommend the same simple habit: keep your wallet or purse, keys, phone and glasses in the same place every day. Here’s one way to set that up:

Pick one spot near the door you use most, such as a bowl, a tray or a hook.
Put your keys, wallet and glasses there the moment you come in, before you take off your coat.
Choose a second “home” for the phone charger and medication list if you like, and keep it the same every day.
If something keeps wandering, ask where you actually tend to set it down, and make that its official home.

Mayo Clinic adds that clutter makes forgetting more likely, so a cleared-off counter is a memory aid in its own right.

Let Paper (or Your Phone) Do the Remembering

The NIA suggests planning tasks, making to-do lists and using memory tools such as calendars and notes. Mayo Clinic recommends keeping tasks, appointments and events in one notebook, calendar or electronic planner, keeping to-do lists current and crossing off finished items. The key word is one: a single calendar you check every morning works better than sticky notes on three different doors.

Following a daily routine helps too, according to the NIA. When the pills go next to the coffee maker and the trash goes out after Tuesday dinner, the routine carries the reminder for you.

Small Tricks for Names and Numbers

Say it back. Mayo Clinic suggests repeating new information, such as names and numbers, several times when you first learn it. “Nice to meet you, Carol” is a good start.
Say it as you write it. Mayo Clinic notes that saying an entry out loud as you write it down can help it stick.
Do one thing at a time. Mayo Clinic advises limiting distractions and not trying to do too many things at once.

Try an “If-Then” Plan for Things You Need to Do Later

Remembering to do something in the future, like taking a pill or calling the pharmacy, has a name in research: prospective memory. One strategy studied for it is called an implementation intention, a plan written as “if this happens, then I will do that.” For example: “When I pour my morning coffee, then I will take my pill.” The plan links the task to a moment you won’t miss.

A 2022 study in Frontiers in Psychology tested this with 48 community-dwelling older adults (average age about 72) and 59 university students. Older adults who used if-then plans did a little better on a lab memory task than those who got standard instructions, but the difference was not statistically significant, and it didn’t carry over to new tasks a week later. The authors note that earlier reviews of the research found larger benefits for older adults.

The catch: this was a small, single-session lab study, the older volunteers were healthy and highly educated, and the tasks were computer games and a recipe exercise rather than real life. The authors suggest practice and repetition may be needed. If-then plans cost nothing to try, but they aren’t a proven fix.

The Basics Still Matter

The NIA’s list of tips goes beyond notes and routines. It includes learning a new skill, spending time with friends and family, volunteering, getting enough sleep (generally seven to eight hours a night), exercising and eating well, preventing or controlling high blood pressure, avoiding or limiting alcohol, and getting help if you feel depressed for weeks at a time. Mayo Clinic adds that some medicines can affect memory, so it’s worth reviewing your medications with your health care team. For practical help with rest, our sister site has a guide to better sleep after 50.

Puzzles can be part of a mentally active day, too. Mayo Clinic lists crossword puzzles, reading and games among the ways to stay mentally active. If you’d like one for today, try our Word Puzzles.

When Forgetfulness Is Worth a Doctor Visit

The NIA says it’s normal to forget things once in a while at any age, but serious memory problems make it hard to do everyday things such as driving, using the phone and finding the way home. Signs it may be time to talk with a doctor include:

Asking the same questions over and over
Getting lost in places you used to know well
Having trouble following recipes or directions
Becoming more confused about time, people and places
Not taking care of yourself, such as eating poorly, not bathing or behaving unsafely

Mayo Clinic adds that it’s especially important to make an appointment if memory loss affects your daily activities, if it’s getting worse, or if a family member or friend is concerned. Some causes of memory trouble can be treated, which is one more reason not to wait.

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This article is general information, not medical advice. If you notice changes in memory or thinking, talk to your doctor.